I just found this great article by Gloria Lemay at wisewomanwayofbirth.com. Gloria has many many years of experience helping hundreds of families. What is so great about this article is that she lists, quite specifically, the things that we can offer a new family. These things are SO BASIC and yet will be SO APPRECIATED by the new family. If you have ever had a baby, you will know that this is true.
For some of us, it’s difficult to ask for what we need.
If someone asks “How can I help?” “I’d love to help you after the birth. What do you need?” we don’t really know how to respond, or maybe feel temporarily overwhelmed by the question itself.
A simple solution would be to just send them this article:
and they will understand and be grateful for the simplicity of it.
People really want to help
but they don’t want to intrude, and we don’t really have a cultural tradition that guides us. Can it really be so simple as bringing groceries, toilet paper, folding laundry, doing the dishes, vacuuming the rug, making soup? Yes! Having had four babies and four postpartums I say a HUGE RESOUNDING YES! If this can be coordinated among a circle friends, then all the better!
Remember, you will want to think about your postpartum time now, while you are pregnant, and create a BabyMoon for yourself and your little one. You will be providing an opportunity for people to make a meaningful contribution to your baby’s beginning and giving yourself some little moments of rest that can add up to happier mama, more bountiful breastmilk, and a few moments of integration time for the whole family.